• Steve G

Crazy Twitter thread calls for cancellation of the word 'crazy' (and other 'ableist' words)

So for those of you who don't know Twitter is full of absolute nutcases now. I used it in college back when it was popular with normal people and stopped for a few years only to download it again to promote my blog and it's unrecognizable now, basically the Pentagon of PC culture. Every single day I come across tweets that are liked and retweeted thousands and thousands of times and it absolutely blows my mind that people actually think that way. Most of us are familiar with all the gun-toting, anti-lockdown asshats of Facebook but this isn't a political blog so I'm here to tell you that the other side of the spectrum--the humorless, perpetually pissed off liberals of Twitter, are just as bad.

Case in point:

At first glance this doesn't seem so bad, right? Of course there are some words that are harmful to people. I remember in high school there was the big campaign to end the word "retarded" that ended up being pretty successful. With that being said, this absolute lunatic is making a case for the elimination of some of the most entrenched words in the English lexicon.

Blind/Blindly/Turned a blind eye

Yes, folks, the only word in the English language that describes the inability to see is offensive! And the only way to rectify this is to replace it with less-succinct words and phrases that inadequately depict the point you're trying to make! The ref who missed the pass interference call in the 2018 NFC Championship game wasn't "blind," he acted indiscriminately, thoughtlessly and questionably. Did your girlfriend almost hit a pedestrian again? You better not scream "ARE YOU BLIND" as she slams on the brakes and the car screeches to a halt inches from the man's torso because that's ableist. Instead try: "Are you deliberately ignoring that pedestrian?" because that totally packs the same punch. Baseball comes back in a few weeks, so if anyone hears their old man insulting the eyesight of an ump who can't tell balls from strikes be sure remind him to consider the oppressive roots of such language and forever tarnish the one thing you two shared since you were a child. I'd be willing to bet not even blind people get offended by the word "blind". Seriously--if you're blind and reading this, drop a comment and tell me it's offensive. I have a sneaking suspicion that nobody will.


Next up we have two of the most common insults in the English language, and guess what, they're oppressive too! I mean I'm at a loss for words here, really. Don't get me wrong, all of those alternatives are in my rotation (except "bot", what the fuck?) but each word definitely has its own specific connotation and should be chosen with care. I'm not gonna call the guy riding my ass on the highway "dense", "uninformed" or "ignorant" although I've always loved the way "dipshit" rolls off the tongue. But if I'm throwing out "dipshit" every time somebody pisses me off I'm just gonna look uncreative. Plus, everyone knows dipshit is a follow-up punch anyway, the right cross of any effective invective. You can't win a fight without throwing some jabs, and that's why we need words like "idiot" and "dumb" to soften up the target (and the uppercut "fuck" to finish them off). Seriously, the word dumb has never offended anybody in the history of the world because actual dumb people don't know they're dumb and thus can't be offended by the word "dumb." Duh.


And here's another pair of words that most Americans use almost every day. Both of these words have definitions in the dictionary relating to excitement or absurdity, but that doesn't matter, because everybody knows that words can't take on different contexts and meanings over time. That party last night was insane? How can you say such an insensitive thing? You're crazy about a girl? You MONSTER! Describing something as "crazy" is totally where we should direct our anger and not--oh, I don't know--maybe the country's underfunded mental health infrastructure.

And wait just one second! The word "wild" is acceptable? How is that not offensive to feral children? In all seriousness, though, thinking people are going to start making a conscious effort to find substitutes for the words crazy and insane is, well, crazy and insane. Someone call the Country Music Hall of Fame and tell them Patsy Cline is cancelled, and then after that we can all go shout a collective "Fuck you" at CeeLo Green.


Psycho might be the most underrated insult in the game. I mean what other insult allows you to completely dismiss a person's deeply complex feelings with such ease? Is your girlfriend pissed off about something dumb again? She obviously doesn't have valid, intricate emotions that are influenced by your sometimes callous and insensitive behavior. She's just psycho! I mean none of those alternatives even come close to capturing its essence. When she's coming at you over something you said or did you can't start calling her selfish or self-centered because that just looks like a weak deflection and is easily rebutted. The only move is to break out the big guns by suggesting she's so unhinged and irrational that her entire point-of-view isn't worth considering at all. That's how real men do it.

To be honest I'm a little confused as to why this word is even on the list because I'm pretty sure actual psychopaths aren't gonna be offended by it? Just a hunch but I feel like a group of people prone to violent behavior aren't gonna get their panties in a bunch over somebody using the word psycho when their whole schtick is murdering people? Also, if the word is so harmful then why has that "Oh she's sweet but a psycho" song been all over the radio for the past year? That song should be cancelled not because it's offensive but because it sucks. Is there any trope more tired and unoriginal than the "destructively passionate" woman?

This psycho's thread goes on and on. Other offensive, commonly-used words and phrases that apparently need to be replaced are tone-deaf, lame, spaz, "read the room" and "did I stutter." It looks as though the heroic poster actually ended up deleting the thread after actual disabled people chimed in and accused her of infantilizing them and speaking for them. I truly hope that she's just using that as convenient excuse to take the heat off herself (she's learning from her mistakes, guys) and actually deleted it because she realized how idiotic (sorry) the whole thread was. If not, she should be thrown in prison.

Like I said, I usually refrain from commenting on "woke Twitter' because it's its own little bubble of virtue signaling heroes that is in no way reflective of the real world but when I saw that the thread's initial tweet had EIGHTY THOUSAND likes I knew somebody had to be the voice of reason. I mean if you're gonna make a thread like this you might as well argue that insults themselves should be wiped from the English language because that's basically what it boils down to.

I'm gonna go jump off a bridge now but I'll leave you all with this gem:

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